Text and illustration by Claytonian
Etiquette is important, and messing with
it really upsets things. There is a choice to be made whenever you see
someone that does not seem to be Japanese in Japan. Maybe you notice a
skin tone or clothing choices that aren't the norm, but whatever type
of foreigner you realize you've spotted, the conundrum is the same: Do I make eye contact with this person as I walk by? For if I make eye contact, I will have to acknowledge them in some way.
This is something that doesn't happen in the overtly heterogeneous culture I come from. Everyone is different, and reaction to strangers passing by is decided by region. For instance, in my neck of the Midwest, we smile and nod at strangers. If you are on a college campus, you may say hi to a member of the opposite sex. Even then, we never actually stop and talk to the stranger. In other parts of America, the reaction to strolling strangers can be a little different, but I'm not too experienced with travel within my own country (I've been to more foreign countries that I have states).
But when you are in Japan, and you see someone who is also an obvious expat, things get confusing pretty fast. If you try your own traditional greeting, you may be thought a weirdo. At least that's the fear; doesn't matter that you will never see this person again. However, you don't want to seen as rude. But it seems silly to treat someone different because you are both foreigners--you don't have to deal with Japanese strangers after all. But foreigners are different. And so the debate continues within your mind, until you've run out of time and Ahh! We are passing each other now! D'yaah!
And that's when I usually smile and nod, the old standby I grew up with, because there is no other reaction I am prepared to make. Usually, you get a response in kind, but sometimes you get no reaction. This of course is really annoying. I just got snubbed by someone I don't even know! I have friends for that kind of mistreatment. Where's the foreigner solidarity?!
But the worst is without a doubt when you've made the decision in your mind to ignore somebody and they greet you. After all, some days you just want to pretend you didn't notice in order to save your precious nodding energy. As you can tell from the above paragraphs, this is a very stressful experience to go dedicate yourself to anyways. If you get the preemptive greet, you have to reply in kind. The ignominy of it all is just wretched. I just got greeted by someone I don't even know. Where's my personal space? Get out of my Japan!
"Get out of my Japan!" is a joke a friend of mine picked up. It encapsulates perfectly the problem of spotting the foreigner: it's not just that you have to go through the awkwardness of interaction with a stranger, but rather that that stranger is totally messing up the plan. I'm the only foreigner I was expecting to encounter today, and now I'm not special. How rude.
Etiquette is important, and messing with
it really upsets things. There is a choice to be made whenever you see
someone that does not seem to be Japanese in Japan. Maybe you notice a
skin tone or clothing choices that aren't the norm, but whatever type
of foreigner you realize you've spotted, the conundrum is the same: Do I make eye contact with this person as I walk by? For if I make eye contact, I will have to acknowledge them in some way.This is something that doesn't happen in the overtly heterogeneous culture I come from. Everyone is different, and reaction to strangers passing by is decided by region. For instance, in my neck of the Midwest, we smile and nod at strangers. If you are on a college campus, you may say hi to a member of the opposite sex. Even then, we never actually stop and talk to the stranger. In other parts of America, the reaction to strolling strangers can be a little different, but I'm not too experienced with travel within my own country (I've been to more foreign countries that I have states).
But when you are in Japan, and you see someone who is also an obvious expat, things get confusing pretty fast. If you try your own traditional greeting, you may be thought a weirdo. At least that's the fear; doesn't matter that you will never see this person again. However, you don't want to seen as rude. But it seems silly to treat someone different because you are both foreigners--you don't have to deal with Japanese strangers after all. But foreigners are different. And so the debate continues within your mind, until you've run out of time and Ahh! We are passing each other now! D'yaah!
And that's when I usually smile and nod, the old standby I grew up with, because there is no other reaction I am prepared to make. Usually, you get a response in kind, but sometimes you get no reaction. This of course is really annoying. I just got snubbed by someone I don't even know! I have friends for that kind of mistreatment. Where's the foreigner solidarity?!
But the worst is without a doubt when you've made the decision in your mind to ignore somebody and they greet you. After all, some days you just want to pretend you didn't notice in order to save your precious nodding energy. As you can tell from the above paragraphs, this is a very stressful experience to go dedicate yourself to anyways. If you get the preemptive greet, you have to reply in kind. The ignominy of it all is just wretched. I just got greeted by someone I don't even know. Where's my personal space? Get out of my Japan!
"Get out of my Japan!" is a joke a friend of mine picked up. It encapsulates perfectly the problem of spotting the foreigner: it's not just that you have to go through the awkwardness of interaction with a stranger, but rather that that stranger is totally messing up the plan. I'm the only foreigner I was expecting to encounter today, and now I'm not special. How rude.
Don't really know how I stumbled into your blog, but its very cool to read your stuff. I'm a Canadian having lived in China for over two years, before I was roughing it abit, but I'm in Shanghai now.
The Foreigner v. Foreigner stuff is hilarious. Shanghai, like any other Western city, is crawling with 'gaijin' so its crazy to expect to be the 'only VIP white guy' but I still have that, sometimes. I joke around with (Chinese and White) friends that I'm the only Foreigner in my building, and I like it that way because I'm so special... Again, its a stupid joke, of course, one neighbor is indian and the other's american.
Back when I was down South, in a city where NO ONE speaks English, I really felt stunned when I saw a white guy, like they were passing through my 'secret place', I didn't talk to them, it was just too awkward. I guess if I thought most of the 'gaijin' in China were cool guys, I would love to talk to them, but sadly, my assumptions are more 'grimy and sleazy' than that....
But you sound like a cool guy, cuz you profile here says you're checking out some of Japans more 'traditional' areas, very chill
Mike